What Truly Matters

Nana and Benson


I’m not really a fan of social media. I struggle with it. I’m barely fluent in Facebook and now find I have to figure out Instagram! LOL

When I first got into business 27 years ago the primary form of communication was our local weekly newspaper. The poor souls on the advertising team would have to take the information that I provided and come up with an ad that was what my mind was visualizing. I was picky.

I was raised in a home where attention to detail was very important. My dad, who I admired for being the best business man ever, was a successful cabinet maker. He and his brother made the most beautiful cabinets, all because of their attention to detail in my opinion. But, what I didn’t recognize was how much that trait could drive a person crazy as well as those around them!

Over time ‘perfectionism’ started to wear me down and I started to wonder about how perfect things really needed to be in order to still be great. So I began experimenting in different scenarios by allowing myself more creative freedom.

The results were amazing and opened up a whole new perspective that I didn’t allow myself before. I felt lighter, had more time and actually was able to get more done! I was sold on this newer way of being. Well, for the most part!

Unfortunately, old habits die hard. The years and years of walking the path of perfectionism and being within that environment made it second nature to me. And although the trait can be an absolute positive in the right application, it takes a conscious awareness and effort for me to recognize when it’s serving no good purpose.

And so it was that evening that I struggled to create an Instagram post. Struggled is an understatement and I was bordering on throwing my phone against a wall in frustration! The only thing stopping me was knowing that it would wake our sleeping grandson.

But he stirred despite the containment of my frustration and I could see from the baby monitor I was going to have to go in…he was calling Nana. So, in I went with a big cloud of frustration inside me.

I crawled into his big boy bed beside him, telling him it was ok; Nana was there. But Nana wasn’t quite ‘there’. And as I lay there beside him my mind started playing that old tape about not being good enough, not being smart enough, absolutely sucking at business…you might have that tape too.

I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I’m not enough, every single lie that tells me I will never measure up.’

                                                                Song by Lauren Daigle

And then he snuggled into me…his breathing softened and became a peaceful rhythm…his tense little body relaxed and the warmth from it spread across my body and I swear into my soul.


This is what truly mattered.

Not how beautiful or perfect my Instagram post was.

This little boy didn’t give two shits about whether Nana was good enough, smart enough or great at business! He just cared that I was there. That was good enough for him.

And so I set aside that old habit, once again.

”I’m here little buddy…Nana’s here.”


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